Chapter Seven

Published 27th March 2015



I told myself over and over that I did the right thing, that allowing him to know about my mother was exactly what he needed to know…about me! I had the perfect act, played the perfect part of the bastard people expected me to be, all because I just couldn’t risk letting them get close. I lived through it once and it damn near tore me apart. It threw me into a world that moulded the new me. If I went through it again, I doubt my evolution would be as easy.

Everything I became was easy for me, a walk in the park, as I became the first class student of the night.

I know how to fuck a guy. I lost my virginity at sixteen and have been perfecting that skill ever since. Fucking a guy here, getting fucked there, all the time earning money I needed to survive. Eventually, I was earning enough to be able to pick and choose my punters, getting a collection of eager regulars, all willing to let me sleep over afterwards. Gone were my nights sleeping in my church doorway. I upgraded to hotel rooms and nights in absent wives’ beds. My survival evolved into my own pleasure principle as I danced with desire with the creatures of the night.

Like a God, I was worshiped by the men who told me I was beautiful, threw money at my feet, always begging for more. I absorbed their worship, allowed it to run through me, adding to my genetic code to form me into the man I was to become. The man who moved from London to leeds, bored of the hero worship and looking for more hungry eyes to wash over me.

Sex was my addiction. That I knew from the first cock I swallowed down my throat and the first finger that broke through my virgin arse. I wanted it all, but I had my fill of the London men, bored shitless of the same old erection of the men that fornacated with me.

A chance encounter led me to Halo’s, to the place that would become my home, the place I told Charles Jones it needed. I was the overnight sensation, the dancer who went further than the rest. I let the men take hold of my cock as they filled my thong with money, not calling for security, relishing in their desire of me. Leeds was my new playing field, the city I set up home. I stopped moving around as I found myself a small amount of family in Charlie and Kelly. Not that I would ever tell them that.

I allowed them to get close enough, a little closer than the rest, but not so close that if they left me I would need to step into the shadows again. I was done being the dancer in the dark, done being hurt by others that broke through my barriers.

So yes, I had years to perfect the skill, but it really just came naturally to me, like taking your first step as a child. Yet this, what they call ‘making love’, I have no fucking clue how to even start.

I stand at the end of my bed, watching Austin laying naked before me, running his hands down his eager body before resting over his semi erection. As he looks up at me, I try to shake away nervousness, to keep just a small amount of my confidence that is standing terrified at the back of my mind.

My bed is filled with everything I want, everything I need, but fear restrains me, keeping me back from what my heart really wants.

My eyes wander from the beautiful figure on my bed, resting their gaze on the handcuffs on my bed frame. My dirty desire runs away with me, informing me as to how I could use these implements to keep him in place and fuck his tight little arse over and over again until I get satisfaction. I see the image play out, of me grabbing his honey coloured locks and pulling him forward as I force my erection between his lips so he can swallow my length before I fill him with my load.

This I knew. This was the Tom that was locked inside me now, the guy I tried to keep at bay while I dance a new routine.


I shake the thoughts away at the sound of his melodic voice. Something tells me that I can’t do that, not to make love. I look back towards him and I somehow know I need to be gentle with him, take my time as we give ourselves to each other, but….how?

How do you make love, exactly?

Where are you taught to make love?

The only stories I am told about sex are just that, sex. Love is never mentioned as people tell me about the guy they just had, the arse they just fucked. No one ever brings the L word into conversation as they describe a sexual encounter.

So what is this making love?

I never found such a thing on the streets, on my journey towards Leeds. I was never once getting asked to make love to a punter, only to fuck their arse.

I feel sick from the thoughts of the unknown, things that are so alien to me. I want to hurt him, pound everything I have into him as hard as I can and make him scream. I want to sit on his large cock and ride him cowboy style until I collapse from exhaustion.

That I know how to do. That is fucking easy to do!

“Are…you okay, Tom?” His voice is like a siren call, pulling me back to him.

What do I say? Do I let him see just how unsure I really am?

“I…don’t know how…” I find myself saying, frowning slightly at my stupidity, my blatant inability to control my own voice from speaking.

I must look stupid to him, stood here in only my towel and so unsure of what is happening.

Austin sits up, crawls from the head of the bed over to me and takes my hand, pulling me towards him so that I have to reach out and steady myself on my bed, the bed I have had so many men in.

“Its okay, Tom. It’s the same as what you’re used to doing.” I look into his eyes and I know he is saying this just for me, that he is as unsure as I am.

He runs his hands up my naked chest and I can feel my cock enlarging, popping out of the gap where the towel meets and I fight back the urge to drag him up to the head of the bed, force him flat against the wall, and fuck him until we scream out our orgasms.

Why is my head so full of this kind of sex?

Why can’t I think about slow, meaningful love making?

I want to be different, to show him I can be gentle. I have opened up so much to this guy, never before allowed anyone to hear my story, and I want to start us afresh. I want to let him see that I can be more than just the sex filled animal.

I can…can’t I?

I have never wanted to change for a person so much!

His hand moves up to my face and traces my eyebrows, before falling down my cheek and resting his index finger on my lip. He forces his finger into my mouth and I find myself sucking, running my teeth over him, as I taste his honey scent.

I can…I can do this!

I slowly remove the towel so that I bare all for him and watch as he takes a sharp inhale of breath at the sight of me. I move forward slowly, guiding his body back down on the bed before laying on top of him, so that our naked skin finally rests against each other. My hardened length falls onto his and I gently take them both in my hand as I slowly allow them to fuck my palm. I watch as I pull back both our skins to reveal our purple heads before I release, watching our penises move together to the soundtrack of his moans.

I move my eyes up his naked body, the slender frame, small evidence of abs, and hairless chest. His milky skin makes my mouth water and I want to taste every part of him. I don’t want to hurt him like I did before, when it was all about the sex. I want this to be different. I want him…within me.


I lower my lips to his navel and run my tongue up his chest, circling each nipple before moving up to his neck, his chin, before I meet his lips, my destination. I allow our lips to meet for a few moments before I reverse my actions until I reach his penis. My taste buds are already tingling at the taste of his body, the sweet, smooth taste of his skin. They are begging for more, enthralled in the pleasure of his taste.

I hold his perfect penis in my hand and run the tip of my tongue up his sack, over his length, before kissing his head. His groomed hairs still tickle my cheek and lips as I taste all of his ten inches.

I hesitate for a moment, gently working his cock in my hand causing him to gasp, watching his tip beginning to ooze his bright white pre cum. My mouth waters again and I use my tongue to moisten up my lips in preparation.

“I…want you in…me,” I tell him, as I move my lips over his end and devour his head down my throat, tasting the start of his salty goodness.

I forgot how tight my throat is around his cock, and I struggle to get it all in. I relax my throat as I push further down, choking down the rest of him before I slowly pull out, dragging my teeth up his cock, causing his moans to excite me. I swallow him again, moaning to send vibrations up his cock and through his body. Right on queue, I hear him rasp, pulling onto my hair, causing my cock to harden and my nipples to firm. To tease him further, I gently tickle his balls, resulting in his moans getting louder.

Goose pimples explode all over my body as an amazing shudder goes down my spine and my heart starts to skip beats. I have never felt this before, not with the many I have fucked. I want this to be all about him, us, as these new sexual feelings tingle through me.

My arse is calling for him, wanting him deep within it, shouting through my body that it is ready.

I move my head back up his body, still kissing every inch as I make it to his lips. I pull my arse over his groin and rest myself on his fully hardened cock. I allow the tip of his dick to go slightly in my hole, taking his first inch within me, and I instantly hunger for more. I know from Austin’s playful moans that he is ready to be within me, ready for me to begin. I dance my hips around his cock for a few moments like he once did for me, never taking my eyes off his as his hands run up my body. I pull them to my nipples which he teases for me, making me even more horny, even more ready to make this thing called love. I look down at my dick and can see my head is already white, ready to explode my load like an unsexed teenager.

I reach down to kiss him while I guide my hand to my bedside drawer and pull out the condoms and lube. I pull back my head and smile down into his beautiful face while I unwrap the condom and hand it to him as I release his cock from me. I discard the wrapper and begin to lube up my arse, allowing my fingers to enter deeply within me, circling lube into my ravenous hole, readying myself for his beast.

“Ready?” I ask. He simply nods before I begin applying lube generously to his cock.

I look down at his condom covered cock, all ready and willing for me to make my strokes over it.

This is it, Tom. Time to have him…the way you need him.

I place the bottle on the side as I rest myself back on his welcoming erection. I bite down as I start to lower myself over him. With each excruciating inch, I want to scream out my words of love that are washing over me. Austin’s hands move up and down my body and I grab onto them, pulling him to sit up as I force his hands behind me before fully taking all of him in. I bite my lip to stop me screaming as I squeeze my eyes closed. I wrap my legs around his body, pulling him in closer, as I grip onto his hair and allow us to kiss, unable to move for a moment due to the pain of his large cock deep within me.

“So…tight…may…cum…!” He gasps through my lips, causing me to smile as I start to ride up and down his painfully large monster.

He isn’t the only one.

With each movement I make over him, I have to fight back the urge to cum and he isn’t even touching my dick. I can see myself reflected in his eyes and can sense that we are both close to our first loving climax.

I take his lower lip between my teeth, biting gently as I try to keep hold of my ejaculation, slowing my pace down slightly so that each movement is longer, more intense. I lift myself off him before sitting back over each inch, gliding over every part of his erection as he grips onto my waist, squeezing tightly as I dance over him. I lock my legs around his body, moving his hands to my arse so that he can move me to his will over his enlargement.

He moves me well, gripping each cheek as he guides me up and down his cock, eventually moving one hand behind him for greater support as I bounce my hips in time to his grip on me. Not once do our eyes fall from one another. Not once are our faces more than a few centimeters apart.

We are panting as I grip onto his hair, knowing I have held back too long already and that, at any moment, I will redecorate his chest with my cum.

“Cum for me, baby,” I moan and almost as if on command, I can feel the condom fill within me as he digs his nails into my back, screaming out in delight.

The feeling of his cum filling the condom is enough to have me screaming, cumming up our chests, before falling into him.

“I love you.”

Our words dance as one, talking together as if from a new voice other than our own and I fall forward, forcing us both on the bed, gasping for air as I pull my legs to his side.

I pause as he runs his fingers through my hair, his cock still deep within me.

“Is that what it’s like?” I ask, unsure.

“Is what?” Austin pants, still lost in our moment.

I don’t look at him, simply lay with my head in his neck before responding.

“To make love,” I say.

He kisses my cheek, moving his arms up my body.

“I think it is…yes,” he says.

I raise my hips to release him from me and gasp as he finally leaves my hole, before falling next to him. We lay there in our own sex, both on our sides facing in, just losing ourselves in each other’s eyes. We never break contact as we just gaze, our hands on each other’s waist, resting gently as we smile at each other. We don’t speak as we lay there, content in our own sexual silence, not caring that we are still covered in cum, not caring that we both smell our own lust.

I watch as his eyes fall heavy, fighting to stay in contact with my own, until he loses and is pulled into sleep. I am not far behind as I take in his sleeping state, his small delicate snores and his mouth hanging open slightly. I pull my body closer to his, kissing his sleeping lips one last time before I rest my head on his. I feel his snores flow over my face as my own eyes become the weight of anvils.

We fall asleep still in each other’s arms, both wearing nothing but our smiles.

I don’t dream about sex, or about strange men.

All I see as I close my eyes is Austin.

The man I love.


I promise to try and not hurt you!

He said these words to me, words that hung in my head and ran through my body, repeating over and over to every muscle, every cell. How could he ever hurt me? I should be the one falling to my knees before him after the story he told me, after he relived his past right before my eyes.

I could never have imagined what he went through, never even got close enough to the truth without his retelling. The guy with the confidence, who had everyone eating out of his hands, had crumbled before me and become the fragile child.

Is it wrong that I was a little happy he opened up to me, to little old Austin Mann?

I wake, having slept for what seems like forever, yet it is still dark outside. It’s clearly still middle of the night. I turn over in his bed and notice he isn’t there, shocking me to sit up and look around, trying to focus my eyes with the dark.

Did he leave?

Was all he told me just an act? A way to get me into his bed again?

I look around his flat, my heart tensing in panic, then I see him stood looking out of his large windows, with the moonlight lighting parts of his body. He looks like a model stood waiting in the moonlight, as shots from a camera take all of him in, capturing the perfect image. The light is running down one side of him, leaving the rest in shadow, with a small amount on one cheek of his perfect arse. My cock hardens at the sight of him and I find myself leaving the bed, walking over to where he stands, and running my hand up his naked back. He jumps slightly at my touch.

“Sorry…” I say, my voice just a whisper.

He turns into me and smiles. “Can’t sleep?” He asks, running his hand up my naked side, resting on my right butt cheek.

I shake my head. “I woke and wondered where you went. Thought you might have…”

He smiles, but hangs his head, evidently a little hurt.

Well done, Austin!

“You thought I left you like before, didn’t you?” I hang my head, slightly ashamed, causing him to laugh. “Don’t worry. I am not going anywhere this time. I was just…horny! Came here to stop myself…pouncing on you!” Even under the moonlight I can see him blush.

I can feel my cock harden at his admission and I bite my lip. Even though I am exhausted, I know I want more, but this time I want him…in me.

I saw that he can be gentle, that he can make love. However much he has to hold back and however much I loved it, I don’t want him to hold back again.

I want the old Tom and the new to merge as one, so that he can enjoy our sex with just a little more intensity.

He needs to know that I enjoy it soft and gentle, but hard and fast.

I pull his lips to mine, kissing him gently before grabbing his cock and squeezing it a little too hard, causing him to pull his lips from me, gasping.

“A… Austin?” His breath is raspy.

“It’s okay, Tom. just because you fuck me hard doesn’t mean you love me any less,” I say, watching as he looks down at me, his lips forming a smile as his eyes sparkle.

I can feel his cock hardening in my hard before his pulls me into him, biting my neck like he did before. This time though, I can feel the love within his passionate touch.

“Bite me, baby!” I exclaim.

He stops for a moment, licks my neck and nibbles my lobe gently, before breathing his words heavily into my ear.

“Lets find a way to make love the Tom and Austin way,” he says, grabbing my cock and leading me to the bed.


Okay, so I may not have thought this out very well, only really working out the plan enough to help him with little thought about the after, about what happens next. Yes, Tom was leaving with his boo. That part of the plan perfectly played itself out, minus a few mishaps, one being him attacking everyone in his path, but now I am a dancer down!

A big fucking dancer!


Well done, Kelly!

In one night, I introduced my clientele to a new dancer, whetting their appetites only to have him be taken home, with my star attraction!


Once again, the businesswoman of the year award will not be going to Kelly Jones.

What happened to Tom?

We need more Tom!!!

Nag, nag, nag, whine, whine, fucking whine!

Seriously, these fucking men need to build a bridge and get the fuck over it! I mean, men are like balloons. You see one, you’ve seen them all!

He isn’t here and will not be back tonight, so get a fucking grip. If you can’t do that then I suggest a girl’s best friend when dealing with asshole men…Vodka!!!

Okay, so I would never say that to a customer, but I am fucking tempted. Anyway, shouting at a customer is far better than smashing them over the head with my baseball bat…so my father tells me, anyway.

It’s hard to not grab the bat though, let me tell you!

Like all men, it didn’t take them long to see something shiny and get distracted. The shiny is the nice, see-through thongs I made my dancers go change into while I sorted out the commotion. Once again, they are all watching, jaws hanging open as the dancers make it back onto the stage to Airs ‘Sexy Boy’, a nice slow number for the boys to pull the men back in.

It’s a good thing I only hire perfection, taking on only those that will drive a fucker wild. Sadly though, the good looking ones are normally the stuck up little shits!

I watch as the men fall over themselves again to get at my staff, touching their own expanding crotches before the movement of my boys.

I am a genius. Maybe that award will be mine after all.

Jane comes behind the bar, interrupting me marvelling over my accomplishment, grabbing herself a drink. As usual, she is dressed in one of her silky evening gowns. Her head is full of flawless curls, her choice hairstyle of the evening. Once again, she is overdressed. Clearly, I pay her too much.

She necks a large whiskey before leaning against the bar and frowning, twisting one of her curls between her fingers.

An unhappy Jane is the last thing I need, a storm I do not need smashing through the bar right now.

“What’s up, slut? you missed a sale somewhere?” I say, grinning at my friend.

Her frown breaks for a moment as she laughs a little, before returning back. “It’s fucking Daniel. He has been moaning at me all through his break about Tom leaving! When will he get a bloody grip and move the hell on?”

I let out a sigh, walking over to my best friend since school, and rest my head on her shoulder for a moment. “Want me to have a word with him? He has been off his game since they left and I was planning on having a word if he didn’t man the fuck up!”

Jane places her arm around my shoulder as we look out into the bar at the dancers on show.

“I would recommend it, before I rip his hair out,” she says, laughing, and we chorus our next word together. “Men!”

“They really are the weaker sex.” I am not just saying that because I am a feminist bitch, far from it, it’s just fact!

When men are sick, they don’t go to work. They just lay on the sofa pleading with us like babies to end their suffering. When women are sick, we get to work, do the food shopping, make dinner, and bathe the kids, all without a frown. Yes, I don’t have kids. I mean, I spend my whole life around gay men, so I don’t really see kids in my future. However, even without kids, I know I could manage to sort them out while ill, without moaning.

Wait! I have a staff of dancing, bitchy gay men! That has got to be worse than kids, right?

“I hear that, sis,” she says, looking out into the bar. “They are fucking hot, though.”

I burst out laughing, watching as some of the bar staff stare at me confused. Jane had the best way of seeing life.

I get myself a shot of tequila before leaving the bar, taking Daniel by the arm from the front door, which he was manning while Jane was on break, and lead him into my office, closing the door behind me. I sigh as I take in the love sick puppy before me.

Poor kid.

He looks at me nervously and although I like him, I know it’s tough talking time.

Time to get in boss mode, Kelly!

“Okay, Dan. Talk!” I demand, walking toward the guy I have watched these past few months slowly become infatuated with Tom.

He hesitates for a moment, looking down at me, before finding his balls and speaking.

“I don’t know what you mean, Bells,” he says, using his ever insistent pet name on me.

I will not hit him, I will not hit him!!! The thoughts fill my mind and I try to still them. Maybe just a hard slap with your bat?


I ignore my head and stare up at my tall, russet skinned dancer, gazing into his once confident, dark eyes that have slowly melted around Tom.

“Daniel, please do not think me a fool!” I begin. “For months now, I have had to watch while you follow after Tom like a bad smell. Seriously, when will you learn that he will never love you?”

I watch as his puppy dog eyes fill with moisture, his brows turning into each other as his lip begins to form into a pet lip.

Great. Here come the fucking water works!

“You…don’t…know…ANYTHING!!!” He spits out his pain filled words.

I don’t know anything?

When it comes to knowing Tom Parks, I wrote the fucking book! I know how he can manipulate the mighty and have them crumbling before his dimple filled smile. His dazzling blue eyes that have enough beauty within them to even have my very hetrosexual father giving into him. I have marvelled at the sight of Tom, taking everything he wants, while giving just enough to reel the men in and then spit them out.

I may not know much about his secret past, but I know it isn’t something he likes to broadcast. Yet, since I have known him, I have watched him like a naturist studying an animal, watching as he goes in and claims his prey.

So here I am, again, cleaning up after his latest devour.

I try to keep my tone gentle, not wanting to hurt him too much.

“Sadly, darling, I know all too well. I have watched this happen many, many times over.” My tone kills my throat. I really just want to shake him, beat him around the head, and tell him to get the fuck over it!

I watch as his face burns up, as he takes in what I say, visually shooting the messenger…something I should be used to by now!

“You’re…wrong!!!” He says, pulling his head away from me, before making his escape from my office, the tears already falling.


Yet again, I am the bad guy, the hard faced bitch! Yes, I want to help him, let him know Tom has moved on, but some people will just never listen, only hearing what they want to.

I lean against my desk as I think of Tom and Austin, hoping that they will stick, that I won’t have to break another guy’s heart for him.

Please, let it be the last time.

Sadly, knowing Tom, he is just two steps away from fucking it all up.

Please try, Tom. Try and be happy.


I saw the movies, heard the songs, witnessed the effect they had on people, but never knew what it meant. To me, I just saw some idiots crying over something so pathetic, not knowing the power behind the four letters.


I had created the perfect locked box and kept it so far at bay that I just didn’t see what everyone else did. Watching and listening just made me uncomfortable. I found my happy place in an action movie, a rock song, things I could relate to, things that just made sense to me.

Making…love…to Austin, was different, more intense, as I fought to stay on track and not allow my cock to run away with itself and assault into him. I want to make him feel special. Before, it was all about me: my needs, my desires, not caring how they felt. Now, it has all changed. It’s all about him, his pleasure, his desires being met.

Luckily, it turns out the man I gave my heart to like his sex…rough!

I feel different after telling him, after finally allowing my story to break from my lips and fill his un-judging ears. He doesn’t look at me differently like I assumed he would, doesn’t expect anything from me, and never once trying to psychoanalyze me.  He’s happy to leave my story there, not pushing me further.

Two weeks have passed since that night and the only real change is that now, when I come home, I open the door to my flat and am now greeted by those blonde curls, smouldering brown eyes, perfect smile, all pride of place on top of his perfect body.

My once empty abode now has a small treasure awaiting me. I no longer need to bring someone home with me. The thoughts no longer fill my head.

There Austin always is, to greet me from my shifts at the lounge. No matter the time, he is always awake waiting for me. These are the days he stays over, but somehow, I never want him to leave.

Now when I dance at Halo’s, feeling the men look at me, touching my dick, I don’t care. I just look down at them now as I go about my work. My private dances are just that, dances for men who I no longer allow to give me a happy ending. Now I am becoming Tom the professional…yet a part of me is always wanting to pull away, fall into the sex filled crowd, and shove my cock down a willing throat.

I fight to stay strong, see his beautiful face in my head, and it stills my hunger. It builds up so I can give him everything.

I encourage him to stay over on these nights, so I don’t have the urges take over me. I want so much to be what we both need, the perfect boyfriend.

I just don’t really know how.

To change almost ten years of myself in just a few short days seems impossible! This is something that just won’t happen. I can’t just wipe away my past and become something I am not, however much I want it to be so.

I am starting from scratch with him, slowly pulling away the elements of Tom the dancer, the man out to fuck the world, to become just Tom and hopefully…Austin.

The start of our relationship has not yet left my flat. He goes to University while I work, still with Emily, but only having photos taken, not agreeing to any more movies. It’s less money, but I already make enough from Halo’s, regardless of the fact I don’t throw guys fucks now. I pretend that I want to stay at home and have him all to myself, but in reality, I am not yet ready to broadcast my relationship status across the world.

Not yet!

These things take time and I need just that.

Luckily, I know he is just as terrified of people’s reactions towards our relationship, so he doesn’t push me to do things I am not yet ready for. We don’t need any third party interference. We just need our time, to formulate our relationship.

Each night when I come home, I watch as he greets me, knowing that with each day he is falling harder and harder for me. A part of me is still willing to break his heart, drop him like all the rest, but a huge part is taking over, one that is telling me to try…just try!

It’s hard, but I am trying, giving all I have within me to give and with each day, more is there for him.

I am falling hard into the weakness that is love, becoming someone I used to scoff at.

I just really want to try, for him…for us!

I know he is trying to help me change, and become what I need to be. Every time I walk through the door, he greets me in a new way. One to drag me back to bed, to have him against the wall, over my balcony. Each time, he becomes more experimental, knowing that this is what I like.

The first time, it was him just standing naked by the door, pulling me into the room. The next he was already playing with my toys, sliding down my dildo, smiling at me. Eventually, he moved into outfits, completely see-through clothing, pants with no crotch so his cock hung free. Once, he was tied to a chair blindfolded. That one still fucking impressed me and he won’t tell me how he got himself that way…made for some perfect sex.

Every second or every minute during our sex, we say the words over and over. They glide from my lips, but come from my heart…and I mean them.

I love you.

Tonight, when I walked through the door, I assumed he had given up and gone back to his just plain vanilla self, standing naked before me. Then I saw the bowl of whipped cream…

He smiles, taking some cream on his finger to his mouth, and sucking it seductively.

“Hungry?” He asks, finally removing his suck on his finger.

I am already undressing as I walk towards him, releasing my enlarging erection as I look at him.

He takes some cream and spreads it over his nipples.

“Eat!” He commands. Yes, he is now commanding me!

Instinctively, my lips fall to his chest, lapping up all the cream, swirling my tongue over each nipple while tweaking the other. He pulls my hair, drawing my face to his, but not forward for a kiss. He glides his hand from my hair, over my cheek, just smiling as his hand disappears down.

He looks at me, grinning, before pushing me back lightly.

“Eat!” More demands, and I look over his body to reveal his fully cream loaded cock. I lick my lips before falling to my knees, taking the tip of his large head into my mouth and clearing it of cream.

I pull my head back to look up at him, smiling into his eyes. “Never had such great tasting cream,” I tell him.

It was true. The mix of the smooth creamy taste with his delicious salty cock centre had me wanking myself vigorously.


This new Austin, my boy, trying to become a master as he forces me to his will is…agonising! As he makes his commands, I want to grab him, take over, and show him who is boss…but I don’t. Instead, I revel in his seduction as my cock pleads to be touched by him, to be pushed into one of his holes. Holding back is killing me and my aching muscle, but I don’t fight him as I allow his moment to play out.

I, Tom Parks, am on my knees before absolute pleasure.

I saw this side of him, when we first fucked, before I said the words, when I had him screaming master! Yet now, he is the master and I am his ever willing slave.

He pulls my head back to his cock and I work my tongue over his girth, clearing it of cream until it is clean, before devouring him down my throat and ticking his balls until I feel his load fill my throat.

I stand up, finally moulding our lips together, tasting the cream already in his mouth as I pull him into me, gripping his perfect arse as I force our erections painfully together.


I look down at the fallen bowl of cream, thankful for the plastic bowl, and smile as he falls to his knees, clearing it up, apologising all the time.

His perfect arse is in the air as he cleans the mess. He takes it the the sink and I can’t help myself; I walk up behind him and pull his back into my chest, forcing him to discard the bowl in the sink while I kiss his neck, grabbing his cock.

“Where tonight, baby?” He asks, pulling his arms back into my neck.

I pick him up, carrying him over to the bed, still kissing his neck. I want him the way I had him the night I told him my past, on my bed. I don’t want him in any other way, not with my head still all over the place, pulling me in every direction, still wanting to fuck him and leave him in a heap.

“Here?” He asks, as I place him on the bed gently, confusion in his voice.

He is getting used to the experimentation, but as my head whirled inside me, I just want him in no other way.

I turn him on his back, looking into his dark eyes as I lay over him. “Yes, baby. I want you this way tonight.”

He nods up at me, relaxing slightly, giving himself away to the fact he plays for me. I smile as I kiss him, work my lubed fingers within his ever tight arse, preparing him for my assault.

His eyes close, smiling at my touch within him, his legs parting as he awaits me, taking his cock in his hand and working it gently.

With my free hand, I place a condom on before entering into him, listening to him moan as I pull his legs over my shoulder before I force myself in, working my cock into him as I balance on my toes, fucking the man that I am fighting not to leave, not to become my old self.

As I climax with him, him up my chest, I pull out of him and pull his back into my chest, kissing his back as he gently strokes the arm I have draped over him. I listen as his breaths soften, drawing him into sleep.


My head and heart have their epic battle within me. I try to ignore it and lose myself into the man I am holding, listening to him breathe, a gentle snore escaping him.

I rest my head into his back, holding him tighter as I plead with myself for my heart to win out, for me to stay here where I know I can be happy.

“I am trying, Austin.” My voice is barely audible, but as soon as his name leaves my lips, I swear he tightened his grip on me.

Did…he hear me?

He doesn’t wake, just carries on snoring and I relax slightly, allowing my thoughts to leave me as I, too, prepare to venture into sleep.

My last thought before my body goes into sleep is of Austin and how much I want to find the strength to remain.



I wake with his arm across me, still holding me in his arms and not turning away as I expected. He still wants me close to him and the thought makes me smile inside as a warmth flows through me.

Even after all this time, he is still here, still wanting me. I allow myself a girly giggle at the thought of how happy I am right now.

The only thing that is ruining this moment is the buzzing of a mobile. I sit up, leaving Tom still in his deep slumber, as I search the room for the annoying noise. I see his IPhone on the coffee table, not moving, so I know it must be mine and I begin the search for my jeans, to silence the damn humming.

The bathroom!

I make my way to the small room and close the door behind me as I pick up my jeans that I discarded after my shower, and collect my phone.

Twenty missed calls?

All from Samara!

I almost drop my Nokia as the phone buzzes again. A picture of Samara’s smiling face greets me. I press ‘answer’ and take the phone to my ear as her soft, tearful voice echoes within the small room.

“Austin! Austin, you there?” She pleads.

I pause for a moment before finding my lost voice.

“Samara, yes it’s me. I am so sorry, can you forgive me?” I say, in a hushed voice so Tom can’t hear me.

“Austin, please listen. I am so sorry, but I told my mother why I was so upset and didn’t go home that weekend when I was at yours. I didn’t think she would tell your mother! I am so sorry, Austin, please forgive me.” I can hear her voice break as she starts to sob.

She wants me to forgive her?


What she said hits me and I allow my phone to drop to the floor and shatter against the tiled surface.

Oh, dear God, no!

My parents know!



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